...or stop wearing mascara altogether.
I've had my moments of calm in the past month since we committed to adopt Alina, and I've also shed more tears than any other month on record. That doesn't mean that I'm not happy and hopeful, it just means that many things have touched me very deeply.
I realized recently that Alina has not only spent her whole life without a family to love her, but also that she very likely has not one earthly possession--no clothes, no pictures, no special toys of her own.
Not that it is important to have "things"--but to not have anything--well, it really puts things in perspective.
This little girl has no idea how much she is already loved. She has a bed waiting, already dressed with special, new, pretty bedding just for her. Her Grammy and Papa got her a soft toy to cuddle, and we've bought a few new velvety soft, satin-trimmed blankets to wrap her in. Cute and comfy outfits have been lovingly tucked in packing cubes to take on our journey, along with small toys and books to entertain and (hopefully) keep her attention. Russian-language lullabies played in Bridget's bedroom while she slept today, as I recorded the track numbers of songs we'll load on an iPod to bring and play for her new little sister.
Most importantly, a family--and a lifetime of love--awaits her arrival, here, half way around the world from where she was born. We'll honor her heritage, and we will cherish her. Our hearts are full of joy and hope as we prepare to bring her home.
Spring can't come soon enough.