Wednesday, March 24, 2010
It is hard to believe that we are so close to meeting our new daughter.
We are enjoying a few quiet and relaxed days at the beach before we come home to finish preparing for our (even bigger) trip.
Please keep us in your thoughts as we move forward in the final phase of our journey to Alina...
Friday, March 19, 2010
The Starfish Story
adapted from The Star Thrower
by Loren Eiseley (1907-1977)
Loren Eiseley was an anthropologist who wrote extensively. This story has appeared all over the web in various forms, usually without credit given. Sometimes it is a little girl throwing the starfish into the ocean, sometimes a young man, once even an elderly Indian. In any form, it is a beautiful story and one that resonates with people all over the world.
Once upon a time, there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work.
One day, as he was walking along the shore, he looked down the beach and saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself at the thought of someone who would dance to the day, and so, he walked faster to catch up.
As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young man, and that what he was doing was not dancing at all. The young man was reaching down to the shore, picking up small objects, and throwing them into the ocean.
He came closer still and called out "Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?"
The young man paused, looked up, and replied "Throwing starfish into the ocean."
"I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?" asked the somewhat startled wise man.
To this, the young man replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going out. If I don't throw them in, they'll die."
Upon hearing this, the wise man commented, "But, young man, do you not realize that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish all along every mile? You can't possibly make a difference!"
At this, the young man bent down, picked up yet another starfish, and threw it into the ocean. As it met the water, he said, "It made a difference for that one."
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
I can't seem to shake the nesting instinct, and I am stocking my house as though we will be unable to get supplies of any kind until next Christmas :). I even pulled out--and used--the steam cleaner that has been sitting in our upstairs hall closet for the past two years gathering dust. (I knew there was a reason I purchased that thing!)
We are only 3 1/2 months into our paper pregnancy, but we're already within weeks of meeting our newest little one. In a typical pregnancy, I am just beginning to get over the morning sickness.
I may not be posting much over the next couple of weeks, although I will certainly post any big news, such as a travel date ;).
We are headed south for a family vacation, where we'll spend most of our time building a huge sandcastle, enjoying the sunshine (and each other!) and collecting seashells. Just what the doctor ordered :)...
Monday, March 15, 2010
Pictures of orphans are functional in nature, for the purposes of documentation. I can't wait to photograph her through a parent's loving eyes, taking care to capture an expression that reveals a little bit about who she is. (I hope she doesn't mind having her picture taken, because I am sure it will be like having the paparazzi over here when she comes home.)
Right now, Alina is an orphan, with nothing of her own--no family of her own, dressed in someone's old clothes. She hasn't known what it means to be able to trust that someone will always be there for her. She hasn't known what it means to be valued as an individual. It breaks my heart to see that in this picture, even though we already knew it.
We cannot wait to hold her and love her and tell her she's finally home. We cannot wait to get her into our arms and begin to restore her to the child she should always have been.
We are ready to begin our new journey. I hope she is ready for us :)...
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Thank you so much for all the prayers and well wishes. We are so blessed!
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Monday, March 8, 2010
When you blink something, your subconscious mind assesses, calculates and concludes something, and then alerts your conscious mind to a decision--thoughts, emotion, knowledge and experience all come together to give you direction, or to give you an answer.
We've been asked how we came so quickly to the decision to adopt Alina.
Did we fall in love at first sight? What was it about her that tugged so strongly at our hearts? Did we thoroughly discuss all aspects of adding another child to our family before committing to adopt her? Did we mull over the pros and cons of international adoption? Did we consider what impact adopting another child with special needs would have on our family, and on our other children?
I knew as soon as I saw her sweet little face that we were going to be Alina's forever family. I couldn't imagine having her ornament on our Christmas tree each year, always wondering if she was healthy, or warm, or smiling, or feeling loved. Chris was drawn to her, too. But the short and most complete answer to the question of how we arrived at our decision: we blinked it.
Without sorting out each issue individually, Chris and I both synthesized a large amount of information in a very short period of time. We knew our hearts--and our instincts--were telling us to bring Alina home to us. Luckily, we came to the same conclusion and neither of us felt the need to consider our options for an extended period of time. We both knew that the blink was right.
We have talked since about all of the things which we both knew when we decided that we would be Alina's yes.
Her picture--the only one we have of her, still:
The version on the left is what we saw on Reece's Rainbow. It is not a good picture, quality or otherwise. Alina's expression is blank, her head is shaved and her little lips are really chapped. But through that picture, we both saw a diamond in the rough. We took that picture and mentally dusted it off. And what we saw beneath was a beautiful, amazing and able little girl.
It was an absolute blessing that the picture looked yellowed and grainy. It made us stop and notice her.
This little girl needs a family and she will be overlooked because of this picture, was all I could think when I first saw it, so I went to work right away on color correcting and lightly editing the photo (version #2, on the right).
Chris and I were looking at a picture of a little girl who is considered "severely disabled" in her society simply because she has Down syndrome, and we know that she was most likely abandoned because of that diagnosis. We both saw so much potential in Alina and know that she deserves opportunity and happiness as much as anyone else. We have the desire and ability to offer her the chance to pursue her dreams.
We have no idea what she is able to do at this point in her life, and it really doesn't matter how independent she is, or how she is limited. We aren't looking at her thinking, What can she do for us? We're focused on what we can do for her. We know she will add her own light to our group and enrich us all in ways we could never imagine. Love adds--it never takes away. We both firmly believe that.
We have a first-hand example--in Bridget--and know that people with Down syndrome have many abilities. Alina is sure to have her own set of challenges and skills. We all do.
Alina is just a little bit younger than Bridget. We have researched therapies, medical care, financial planning, education, nutrition, etc. for Bridget and have already found our way through many aspects of having a child with Down syndrome.
We have a wonderful pediatrician and school system. We are surrounded with people who care about our family and who believe in us--and in our commitment to living a life filled with love.
We already have a house full. What is one more :)? And we already have a child with Ds. That's no big deal for us.
We have the benefit of knowing that having Bridget as a sibling has only enhanced the lives of our other children. They adore her. They all quickly agreed that Alina would be welcome and well-loved here, with us.
In the blink of an eye, all of these things came to mind. We knew right away that we we're taking a gigantic leap of faith.
We know now that it is also a giant leap of love.