Q & A

I didn't get a chance to answer everyone's questions while we were in Ukraine, so I will try to get to some of the questions left in our comments section. Please email me or leave comments here with anything else I can answer for those who are interested in knowing more about our adoption process or experience with Alina.

Q. I tried to follow your time line you have listed and wanted to ask you, did you only have to make one trip to Ukraine for Alina? If so, wow...how did you guys pull that off?

Q. Please give me your secret.... things have gone so well for you hope I have the same luck. Will you have to wait the 10 days?

Q. Are you kidding?!?!? That was the fastest court ever! And the 10 day wait will be waived?!?!? Is Marina your facilitator?

A. Since there have been many questions about our quick timeline, I'll try to address several issues at once.

I am happy to answer questions about our adoption process. Each family's experience is different. Even families traveling to the same orphanage can have wildly different experiences based on many factors (such as specific facilitators, judges, groupas, etc.). Even slight adjustments in adoption policies or requirements, or the political climate in a country can have large impact as well. Things that are out of our control, such as power outages, national holidays, a particular person being on vacation--or a VOLCANO (!)--can come into play in any adoption and make a difference on timeline and cost. Flexibility, creativity, determination and faith are all key.

The disclaimer: Please know that whatever I write about refers specifically to our experience which may or may not be similar to what others have experienced or will experience.

With that said...we were in a VERY FAST region and had a lot of good luck while in country.

We made one trip and were gone for exactly 18 days. We were in region for only 6 of those days. We had a few extra days in Kiev at the beginning (because our SDA appointment fell on a Thursday afternoon and we couldn't get the referral paperwork/travel in time to get started in region on Friday...so we had to wait until Monday to begin there). We were in Kiev an extra few days on the back end because of the volcano and difficulty getting a flight out.

Once we got to Alina's town, we did not have to wait for any of our documentation or appointments, which is unusual. We were also fortunate to have received our Interpol Clearances, which are done in batches, exactly when we needed them. Alina was actually born in Zaporozhye, so that made things easier for us as well.

In addition, many of the officials were sympathetic to our cause. The 10 day wait is often waived where we were, and the "old" passports (the red as opposed to the blue) are still available and are produced locally, so they can be done very quickly. Our wait was waived and we were able to get the old passport for Alina.

I cannot say enough about our Rock Star facilitators (Serge, Yulia, Marina) and what they did for us. They ran the show and know exactly what they are doing. We just went where we were told to go and did what we were asked to do. They handled everything else.

Q. I should know this, but can you remind us how old she (Alina) is?

A. She turned 3 in March. Bridget will turn 4 at the end of July.

Q. How did you raise funds so quickly? Do you have any suggestions for us? We have not made any commitment yet because the cost of the adoption process is a bit daunting. Any suggestions would be great. I know you are very busy, so whenever you get a chance that would be encouraging to hear how you dealt with the cost.

A. We had money set aside for something else, which we applied to Alina's adoption instead. Fundraising is often one of the most daunting aspects of International Adoptions. We do know several families who have been very successful in raising money for their adoptions. It seems like the most important things are creativity and persistence--and being willing to ask anyone and everyone for help.

Q. You will be on the look out for Tanner, won't you? If you see him, tell him mommy and daddy are coming?

A. I feel so sad that we couldn't get to see the other kids we were looking for! We tried many times to see the other RR children, with no luck. The kids are just so spread out, and they are behind closed doors. The groupas do not interact as far as we could tell. The orphanage also has several buildings, and there is no way to know who is where. Access is very limited, even within the rooms of your child's groupa. Paperwork is required to enter any room at the orphanage, and we only had paperwork for Alina's room.

Q. Are there any kids with Ds in her groupa?

A. There were no other children with Ds in Alina's groupa. We only saw one little boy with Ds outside being pushed in a stroller by a visitor. He was little--maybe 1 1/2 years old. We did not recognize him. (The kids were all in snowsuits and hats when they were outside, which is the only chance we had to see other children, so it was very hard to get a good look at them!) We recognized "Bella"--other angels--though, in Alina's groupa. We were able to observe and photograph her for the family who is coming for her :).

Q. Lisa, the picture of Alina doing your hair reminds me of you doing mine as a little girl! :) Did she yank it very hard? HA!

A. Ah, paybacks Marcy :)! Alina LOVES to brush hair, and she is so sweet when she does it. She is very careful. She did decide that she likes to try to pull my hair at other times though. It is not in an aggressive way...it happens more when she is excited...like wow, we're having fun now! Yippee for me and my way-too-long hair. Guess who will be wearing lots of ponytails and buns for a while ;)?

A Little Show and Tell

I know many of you are enjoying hearing about all we are learning about this area, so I wanted to share a little bit of that today. I will post more pictures as we go, but we are getting ready to board the overnight train to Alina's hometown, so I don't have as much time as I would need to cover this topic in depth.

Yesterday we toured a thousand-year-old monastery complex here in Kiev, as well as a few other historic churches, war memorials and museums with our driver's daughter, Olena. We had an amazing day, and learned so much about this country and its rich history.


Olena is fluent in Russian, Ukrainian, German and English. She speaks English very well, and we really enjoyed learning about WWII, Stalin, Lenin, The Red Army, the Orange Revolution, and the history of this country’s religion, architecture and culture from a Ukrainian perspective. It was a priceless opportunity.

Some things we learned: While the eastern part of the country is heavily Russian-influenced, the western part (including the Carpathian mountains) has a distinct Austrian influence. The western part of Ukraine is also predominantly Catholic. The eastern part is predominantly Christian Orthodox.

There is really an interesting mixture of architecture here in Kiev. Some of the buildings are opulent with intricate detail (designed to show the greatness of the Soviet Union), some are utilitarian Stalinist structures, and there is also some very modern architecture—all mixed together. The older area of town by the new Parliament building is very beautiful and established, with lots of old buildings and big trees. The crocus are blooming here, and I am guessing the trees and bushes will begin to flower in the next month. They are just beginning to bud. The monastery we visited had a courtyard which will be full of roses this summer and lots of magnolia trees. I bet it is gorgeous here in late June.

There are a lot of parks and other areas for leisure. Everywhere you look there is something interesting!

Yesterday, the main street that runs in front of Independence Square was closed to cars (as it is every Saturday). This huge street, and people just strolling or skipping right down the middle. It was so great.Here is a statue which symbolizes victory from WWII:

And check out this gorgeous display of hand painted eggs:



More to come of Ukrainian culture, food, architecture, history, religion...

And ALINA!

Cost of food in Ukraine

An interesting look at groceries here:

Huge bottle of water (6 liters): $2.38

Large bottles of beer (16 ounces): 52 cents each

Pepsi Light (12 ounces): 61 cents


Small bottle of Evian water (16 ounces): $2.50

Small container of instant coffee (Nestle): $7.50

Imported products are expensive in general. But groceries are really inexpensive.

Eating out is much less expensive than eating in the larger, metropolitan areas in the States, like NYC or Chicago. Dinner here in Kiev, for example: A whole pizza; salad of tomato, basil and fresh mozzarella cheese, 1 large beer, 1 glass of pinot grigio and 2 cappucinos...$35. Drinks are very inexpensive, compared to in the States. Maybe that is why many, many people drink beer with meals (?). You can also find meals for much less than this example.

The news is good on this front. There are plenty of great options for food in Kiev...and the price is right :)! Be patient and adventurous with your food choices. You will find foods you enjoy here!

From Experience

This post is for others coming to Kiev as part of the adoption process. While it is fresh, I wanted to jot down a few quick tips based on what we have experienced. This is very stream of consciousness, but hopefully it will be of help to some of you :)!

Each family will have a unique experience, but some of these things will be the same for everyone...

Have a contact person and phone number in case your flight plans change for some reason! Ask for one if it is not offered to you!

Don't be surprised if your accommodations here are not exactly what you were hoping for :). If you are really concerned about where you stay and have to have lush accommodations, you could always book a room at the Hyatt downtown...it is $550 a night!! Our apartment is not upscale at all, but the bed is comfy, the view is gorgeous and the location is good. It provides exactly what we need--a place to stay while we are here!

Toilet paper is not always available in restrooms, and when it is, it often feels like a paper towel. Just sayin'. Bring some if you need soft tp. Bring a couple of travel-sized rolls regardless for emergencies.

Tap water is not for drinking. Or for brushing your teeth. There is no ice (but most of the apartments have a small freezer, so pack an ice tray to fill with bottled water if you feel you must have ice). Many drinks are served warm and bottled water is often carbonated (if you are ordering in a restaurant, especially).

This city never sleeps. Everyone smokes. Everyone. (Okay, maybe not small children, but most everyone else.)

Kiev is BIG--around 3 or 4 million people! It is a little intimidating. It is also very beautiful and there is lots to do! We have found it to be relatively safe. Speak English quietly though, and behave conservatively. In other words, don't draw attention to yourself and shout "I'm not from here?!" Most people will know that anyway...there aren't a lot of foreign visitors...and apparently we stand out :), but it is wise not to be obvious in ways you can control.

Don't carry all your money with you and do not get into your money pouch in view of others. Carry a few hundred grivna with you at a time in your pocket or bag. Any other money or essential identification should be concealed.

For those wondering what to pack: The women here carry ornate or embellished bags and wear jackets with lots of detail. Their clothes and accessories are not plain or simple and are generally very fitted and feminine. People here like to dress up.

The women are wearing boots and trench coats or leather jackets--no flip flops or sandals or white sneakers (fashionable, European style sneakers, flats or comfy shoes are being worn but they are always dark and subtle). Bring at least one pair of comfortable shoes...you will be walking quite a bit...on uneven surfaces, etc. All of the women wear nylons or black tights with dresses, skirts or shorts and boots or very high heels. If you plan on having bare legs, bring nylons or tights. Black pencil skirts and black slacks are very common. A pop of color (yellow, purple, red, fuchsia) in a coat, bag or shoes seems to be in fashion. As is dyed hair...platinum blonde, dark black, red-red. If you are trying to fit in, I wouldn't suggest capri pants or jogging suits. **This changes as the seasons change! In the summer, women wear all kinds of clothing and shoes. Nylons are part of the dress code in the office, but nylons are not worn all the time in warm weather.

Men wear very similar clothing to what men in the States wear. They look more European, though...not a lot of running/gym shoes or sweatshirts, but rather stylish jeans, sweaters, button down shirts...that type of thing. We have seen zero shorts. On anyone. We have seen tight leather pants on many people...men and women...but that is another story altogether ;).

People seem to care about their appearance, but wear the same clothes over and over. When you look around, everyone appears to have worked at getting dressed. People are not sloppy. For sure.

You should be prepared to "pack light" but don't skimp on your essentials (like medicines and items absolutely necessary for comfort--a particular pillow or pair of shoes for example).

While you can purchase many things here, it might be tough to locate a store in which to purchase the item, and it is tough to read boxes/communicate with people. The facilitators could help you in a pinch, but do try to bring plenty of whatever you always use! I tried to pack travel sizes of some things and I should have known which things I did not want to run out of.

Consider cutting down your clothing items rather than other essentials. If you are packing gifts, pack small items.

Carry on a small bag that you can store under the seat in front of you with essentials, including Aleve, Advil, Tylenol, whatever works for aches and pains. Pack eye drops (it is dry in the plane), lip balm and gum or mints (your mouth will feel nasty, trust me!) in your carry on. Pack important papers, a pen, contact info. and passport in your carry on.

Make sure you buy a bottled water once you get past security and put it in your carry on as well...plus a few heavy duty snacks (like Clif bars), because it is easy to miss meals and you don't want to be hungry or thirsty. An eye mask and iPod or something with headphones is awesome for the long trip (the lights come on/people come over the P.A. and keep you awake otherwise).

carry-on essentials:
Travel toilet paper
Melatonin (or another sleep aide)
Tylenol, Motrin, Alleve or Excedrin Migraine
Eye drops (with redness relief and without)
Concealer...Lots of it ;)
Food/Water
Gum, mints, Colgate wisp disposable brushes
Notebook/Pen
Decongestant
Downy Wrinkle release
Hand sanitizer
Documents
Passports
List of important contacts
Sleep mask/travel pillow
iPod
adaptors (and an audio/video cable for an iPod)

Wear comfortable clothes for traveling! You will be in them for 24 hours! If there is space, bring an extra outfit in your carry on bags (yoga pants and cotton dresses are good choices for women--they roll well and take up little space).

A few other important tidbits: You will be given an "immigration card" on the plane on the way into Kiev (pronounced "KEEV' here). This is for customs. They have more at the airport if you need one for any reason, or if you don't get one on the plane. Don't stress about customs...it is easy and quick. The card you fill out is very basic. We did not fill in the line about Visas (they ask what type and for how long), but I don't think that applies to people who are adopting. It seemed to be fine. We put our facilitators address as our location in country. (We had no idea where we were staying!) They did not count our money or check our bags in the airport here. (Neither was checked at home, either...other than the usual security screening.)

Once you get your bags at the airport, you will exit through another set of doors toward ground transportation. That is where the driver will be waiting for you. (The customs and baggage claim areas are restricted.)

Have your driver write down the address of the hotel or apartment you are staying in. That way, if you should get lost or tired of walking, you can take a cab back!

If you go to restaurants, ask for an English menu right when you walk in. We have found that many places have these.

A few good links to have:

currency converter

sight-seeing

wood fired pizza--Pizzeria Napule on Mechnikova Street (yummy, a nice experience, also has a menu in English...and no mayo on the pizza! Very reasonable prices in a nice setting).

It is important to try to learn a few basic words and phrases in Russian. Even if your pronunciation is incorrect, people will appreciate your effort...and even a few basic words will greatly help your interactions here.

Words you should know (for sure...there are others to know, but these are a must):
One - "ah DEEN"
Two - "dvah"
Three - "tree"
This - "eh-tah"
That - "eh-tah"
Hi - PREEV-yet
Thank You - "spa-SEE-bah"
Please/You're Welcome - "pah-ZHAL-uh-sta"
Yes - "da"
No - "nyet"
How much? SKOL-ko"?
Coffee - KO-fee-ay
Water - VO-da
Goodbye - DAS-vee-dan-ya
Excuse me - iz-vee-nee-tee
Kiev - "KEEV"

A note about the markets...they are everywhere and most have a place to change money for you. You will only buy a few things at a time because you need to be able to easily carry your items to your apartment or hotel. If you see this item:buy it!! Our driver talked me into buying one and I wish I'd bought 12. It tastes like strawbery cheesecake, but is a frozen treat. YUM. If you like chocolate, you will love the selection here in the markets and elsewhere. If you drink Diet Coke or Diet Pepsi, look for Coke Light or Pepsi Light. There are plenty of beers and spirits in all the markets--way more than any other beverage by far :). Cheeses, pastries, and smoked or cured meats are all particularly good.

When you first go to the market, be sure to get a couple of large bottles of non-carbonated water. You will need it for drinking, making tea or coffee, and for brushing your teeth. Plan on purchasing at least:

-Milk ("moloko")
-Juice
-Items for sandwiches (lunchmeats, cheese, some type of bread)
-Fruit
-Yogurt
-Toilet paper--a few rolls
-A few snack items (chips and crackers are easy to find & cheap)

It is time for bed! I hope that helps...and I will add to this post when I think of other things!


**New:

Be careful on the streets and sidewalks! Watch where you are walking. It is easy to focus on looking around. You will get hit if you do this in the street or on the sidewalk. Trust me. Cars fly by and everyone walks pretty fast. The sidewalks and stairways are uneven and there are potholes and cracks all over the place. And people park (and drive!) on the sidewalks.

Other Packing Essentials (I will add to this as we go):

Beyond whatever clothes, toiletries and medicines you plan to bring, you should consider also bringing:

-At least one pair of very comfortable shoes
-For women--a season-appropriate scarf (to cover head if planning to visit churches, and to use as a scarf or wrap if needed)
-A large Ziploc bag with smaller baggies, a few rubber bands and paperclips
-Tape, scissors, gift bags, tissue paper, ribbon, pen, note cards and other wrapping items for small gifts
-Small food items that you may really appreciate having while you are away from home: Tea bags, oatmeal packets, soup packets, microwave popcorn, peanut butter, breakfast/protein bars, packets for water (Propel, Chrystal Light). We did not bring peanut butter, but many people do. I don't think you can get it here. I do wish we had brought microwave popcorn!